No BMWs!

I must have slipped through the cracks. My wife's elderly grandmothers have decreed to the boys in the family at least that BMWs are out of the question. I overheard the younger single cousins discussing the issue recently at a party. "Wow!", I thought. I never knew anyone could hate a car so much. I imagined a thousand scenarios where a BMW would become off limits, an accident with one that killed someone, a truly hated friend or relative that worked or owned the company. Maybe there was a Bavarian on the hit list somewhere? I dunno. I asked my wife when we were alone. She told me the car was Ok. They just weren't allowed to marry Blacks, Muslims or Whites.
I must have slipped through the cracks. And I drive a Ford. Just in case. Ooo! It just dawned on me how so out of the question Barack Obama would be.

Arranged Wedding

My wife's younger cousin, let's call him Dkwathh, acronym for "doesn't know what's about to hit him" his real Gujarati name is just as hard to pronounce, is getting married next year. Great, nice girl, nice guy.

So anyway they're over at the house for a gathering of relatives when he mentions that he and his bride to be are going to Paris. Business or pleasure I ask?

Another cousin interrupts with, "To get engaged".

I laugh.

The cousins says, "No really. Their marriage has been arranged but he hasn't asked her formally yet".

To which I respond, "What the ^$#@&? How the hell does that work?

Apparently, the soon to be wed couple have discussed the joint veture with each other and the parents who have since arranged the hall for both wedding and engagement party.  Dkwathh need only propose now.

After this brief description, I look as puzzled as ever at the dozen or so Indian cousins around me who laugh and explain, "It's Indian. It's backwards."

So I got to thinking. Maybe, now that I'm married, I could start dating again? And I'd really like to take that calculous exam again. The possibilities.

On further consideration, I mean we do things like that in the west. Planning our own funeral for instance. But then we don't harvest organs until we're actually dead.